Considering a Quick Trip Home

The deal is the deal.

Sometimes.

Because sometimes the deal changes.

My parents were supposed to visit us in NY for a few days. My father has some things he wanted to talk about. But when your mother has Alzheimer’s things can change. She wasn’t up for a long ride to New York, and she really wasn’t sure who she was going to visit.

My father called an audible, which was okay. I’m not really sure how to handle this development with my kids. I’m not sure how they will respond if they realize my mother has no idea who they are.

So I agreed to travel to them and spend a night at a friend’s house. My plan was to leave around 7 am. Man plans, and God laughs. No, nothing dramatic. I just wanted to do a few things before I left. I packed light, except for books.  I needed my caffeine fix so I made tea. I needed a travel much to keep it in so I borrowed one from my in-laws. By the time I wrote down the routes I wanted it was nearly 8 am. I was off. I could still make it to NH around lunchtime.

Just before I reached the end of Route 8, about 10 minutes away, I realized I forgot the book I was going to give to my father. I’d picked up an extra copy of Keller’s Walking with God through Pain and Suffering. I’m not sure he’d read it, but you never know what the Spirit might do. I knew that I should have taken it out the night before. Well, heading back wouldn’t cost too much head back and I really didn’t want to mail it. So I turned around. When I left, for real, it was 8:30. I didn’t see a cup holder, so I had to pull over to secure the travel mug because things were sliding around. Things just weren’t starting off well.

The radio in the Subee ( the nickname for  the Subaru) doesn’t have an aux jack, so I had to settle for the few stations. These were not good options. Mostly they were NPR. I learned quite a bit about Albany’s politics, including the stat that since 2000 10% of the state legislators have left due to corruption of one kind or another. I actually made pretty good time into Vermont. At times I got stuck behind the scenic drivers, the ones who drive 10-15 miles below the speed limit for unknown reasons. I recently read the Heidelberg Catechism on providence (actually I’m reading Kevin DeYoung’s book on it). I was neither patient, not thankful. I have a ways to go yet in this thing called sanctification.

When I finally took a sip of my tea, I made a shocking discovery. Teaffee! The coffee taste from the mug overpowered the taste of my tea. Not good, not good at all I say.

I had to change the station a few times to another NPR station, usually, as I made my way across Vermont. I often stop at a restaurant near the Quechee gorge. This time I was a little early for lunch when I arrived in Quechee. I tried to call my father to see if they had lunch plans but I had no service. That is another common problem alone Route 4 in Vermont. Shortly after getting on 89 I called my father and talked to him. We would be getting together for lunch. No more than 2 minutes after hanging up with him the highway became a parking lot. I had just passed an exit and was drawing near to a turn around. I quickly used my map app (thankfully I actually had service) and discovered a road that ran parallel to the highway to get me to the next exit. I turned around and got off the highway at the exit.

It just took awhile because of everyone else doing it, and the fact that the light cycles weren’t prepared for such volume. The road we all turned on was not very big, and quickly we were at a standstill, again Some people were turning around. I decided to stick with it even though I was not sure what was going on. There was a turn ahead. When I finally got there, I learned what the problem was. There was a bridge over the road we were one. Our road went through a short tunnel about 10 feet wide. That mean only one car could go through at a time. Cars in each direction would alternate, except the lady who was gabbing on her phone and cut me off. The pace certainly picked up after I passed through the tunnel.

It slowed down again at the next on ramp to 89. You don’t have much time to make a decision on the turn, and I passed by and then realized cars were going up on it. I managed to turn around through the backed up traffic. While waiting to get on the highway I saw they were working on the bridge. So the eastbound traffic was getting off, crossing the road and getting one. The west bound traffic was having to travel the route I took. There was also a plainclothes officer giving an interview on camera about the traffic monstrosity.

Thankfully my journey became exceedingly less eventful and I arrived about 4 hours after I left. The day before CavWife wondered if my father would be there when I arrived. That could create issues since my mother wouldn’t recognize me. Sure enough, the car was not in the garage when I pulled up. So I called CavWife while standing in the shade of a tree. Soon my mother came outside to “keep an eye on the stranger.” While I was talking with her about her plants my father came back from his mail run. In light of the change of plans, my father wanted to put gas in the car I borrowed, and then we went to lunch at a place down the street.

My dad is taking good care of her. It was great to see how patient he was, even when she kept thinking she had to order lunch. I’ve seen other situations like this and the wives have ended up unkempt. But my mother wasn’t.

He made some changes with respect to the durable power of attorney. So we spent time going over it and talking finances. It was all very surreal. Before I left he asked my mother to hug her son goodbye. Thankfully I expected her not to know who I was so it wasn’t a big emotional issue. At least not yet. At some point I will have to mourn the loss of my mother who is there but isn’t.

Trying to beat the rush hour traffic I was off to my friend’s house about 20 to 30 minutes away. I actually beat my friend home so I sat on the back porch and did some reading before the rain came. I was in for a surprise when my friend arrived on crutches. I’d missed the announcement that he was in a motorcycle accident. Thankfully his injuries were relatively minor. The bike, not so much. His family and I enjoyed some pizza and conversation. Since he was on crutches, I didn’t feel like asking him to head out to the porch so I could smoke a cigar.

It is unusual for me to be the first one up, unless I have insomnia. Well, I was up around 6:30 and the house was a quiet as a mouse. Since I didn’t get a chance to walk the day before, I cued up a Keller sermon and walked around the subdivision 2 times. Then I did some reading before taking a refreshing dip in the pool. The water temperature was perfect. I was enjoying the peace and quiet of not having my kids running around. I pondered my book in light of some things Tim Keller was talking about- did I address the one-flesh union sufficiently?

I decided that I should leave about 10 to make sure I had time to cook the ribs for my brother-in-law’s graduation party. I also spent time with the road atlas trying to decide if I should take an alternate route. Since my friends made their way down after I showered I talked for awhile and 10 came and went. Shocking development to be sure. But one of his apps showed they were not working on the bridge again today. No need for the alternate route.

The first part of my trip was largely uneventful aside from seeing a guy on a Harley that had a steer skull strapped to the back, and a Masonic Lodge compass on the rear fender. I made great time to Quechee and planned on eating in the usual place. Unfortunately it was not open. There was another cafe across the street. That was closed too.

I remembered a fire-oven pizza and brew place in Bridgewater and thought I’d try it. One the far side of Woodstock there is a “snack shop”  and I figured that I had pizza the night before and this place probably had fried clams. I hadn’t enjoyed them in quite a few years. After lunch the ride got interesting, and long.

First there was a series of people driving really slow. Like 20 MPH. Eventually this guy realized that about a dozen cars were piled up behind him and he pulled over to let us pass. Things backed up in Whitehall as only one lane of the bridge was open. It wasn’t backed up much the day before, but it was really backed up today. It was probably the beginning of the holiday traffic heading toward the Adirondacks. The back up in Ft. Ann to turn onto 149 was not quite as bad. The really problem was the intersection of 149 and 9. I lost track of how long I was stuck in that traffic because I called an old friend of mine and talked with him until I finally made it thru the intersection and the connection was lost. Just have to love talking on a cell phone in the Adirondacks. Then there was the back up at exit 23 in Warrensburg and a few other back ups on Warrensburg.

When I turned on Route 8 I noticed a button I hadn’t seen before. I pushed it to see what happened. I discovered the flimsy cup holder. I tired to put the travel mug in it- didn’t fit.

I arrived back at the Farm at 4:30, 6 hours after I left. I had a few minutes to hug the kids and wife before working on dinner.

A good trip.