Our personal history can help us, or hinder us. I don’t recall my childhood being one filled with affirmation and praise. I seem quite capable of affirming the kids, but struggle at times when I need to affirm adults. I’m not sure why that is. Perhaps because they don’t often learn new things, and much of my affirming the kids comes as they gain new skills.
Many kids today are growing up in an era of “fake affirmation”. They are affirmed so much for so many things they probably wonder if they can do any wrong. Maybe I had a graduation ceremony for elementary. I can’t remember. But today every little milestone is celebrated so that those that actually have meaning have their meaning minimized.
So there are two errors that can take place: the neglect and over-use of affirmation. One aspect of over-use is the man-centered aspect of affirmation. It is into this context that Sam Crabtree has written his long-needed book Practicing Affirmation. He believes that Christians should practice commending others to the glory of God. In other words, we commend them for character, attitudes and actions that reflect the character, attitudes and actions of God. As a result, we are praising God as we commend them. This keeps us from what he calls idolatrous commendation, and failing to commend (just as sinful as the other extreme).
This is a fairly short book that seeks to facilitate the practice of affirmation. It is not just defending the practice, though he does do that. And there are some questions or arguments he spends more time on. For instance, he spends much time refuting the argument that non-Christians should not be commended. He rightly asserts that such a conclusion neglects two very important biblical truths. First, as James 3 notes, people still bear God’s image. Though unregenerate, non-Christians still bear some testimony to the God whose image they reflect. Second, due to common grace even non-Christians can grow in relative character and act in ways that are commendable.
Cavman Considers 